Hi there! I’m so glad you are here! If you have been following Drums In The Deep for the last few weeks you’ll know that I just finished telling the story of how I went blind.
Pretty serious stuff, I know. And I have more serious stuff to talk about. In fact my next couple of posts will be the most serious stuff yet! (Look honey, I foreshadowed! Aren’t you proud?) But hey, you can’t be serious all the time right? So before I go on I thought I would throw in a little comic relief.
I’ll warn you in advance, I have a weird sense of humor and, well, some people just don’t get it. I don’t even get it myself sometimes.
I used to be a huge fan of David Letterman, and like other fans of Dave my favorite time of the week was Friday when he did the top ten list. So I decided to put together a little top ten list of my own. So here it is, from the home office in Minden, Nebraska:
Top ten things I like about being blind!
#10 I can whack people on the ankles with my cane and pretend it was an accident.
#9 I get to eat with my fingers all the time!
#8 When Joni says, “Are you going to clean up this mess or what?” I can say “What mess? I don’t see any mess.”
#7 My talking watch!
#6 Listening to Jim Dale read the Harry Potter books.
#5 When I get pulled over for speeding, the cop usually feels sorry for me and doesn’t give me a ticket!
#4 Whenever there’s a power blackout I can run rings around the sighties!
#3 I can freak people out just by saying “See you later!””
#2 I get to wear my shades all the time!
And the #1 thing I like about being blind:
Making my screen-reader shout insults at people!
Thanks for reading! See you later!
Genesis 21:6 …God hath made me to laugh so that all that hear wil laugh with me.f
Number six has no humorous content so I'll just assume Jim Dale speaks as if he's sucked on helium.
ReplyDeleteRemind me to post the ten things I like about you being blind! ha ha
Your love
So good to see your post! Hehehe!!!
ReplyDeleteJim Dale ROCKS! I went through a few months where I just listened to Harry Potter over, and over, and over, and over...
I always just "don't notice" when I hear a cat having a fur ball, since I can't see where it is...
I absolutely love saying "so good to see you" or "see ya later".
We had a power outage once since I went blind. I actually came home from a friend's in a cab, and I was gonna test myself on getting back to my door. B came out and met me and said I needed help because the power was out...the cab driver said, "I don't think that matters to her..." and B just laughed. He used his cell phone for light to navigate the apartment, and I just laughed.
Being blind definitely has its perks! Thanks for posting!
Oh yeah, I don't know about Jaws, but some of my favorite words with Voiceover are:
Shhh.
Psst.
Croissant.
Meow.
Wassup.
I love the way my voice, Alex, says these things!
Shhhhhhhh
ReplyDeleteI had no influence,R.
Pssssst.
Maybe I did.
Yes I'd love a croissant.
Meow.Meow.Meow. Meow.
loved that commercial.
so wasssup people?
hahahahahahahahaha *evil grin*
My ten things I like about you being blind:
ReplyDelete10) I get to tell you what to do.(and don’t you dare say, “You always did,honey.”)
9) You have to trust me 100% or you’ll fall in a pond or something. (or maybe pushed)
8) When you hit people with your cane, I can giggle behind their backs.
7) You can’t run circles around this sightie. haha (I was a bored child and played blind mans bluff by myself!)
6) You get to play blind mans bluff without a blindfold!
5) I used to get the computer more until this big man eating fish came along.
I love watching you at the computer.
4) I can totally ignore what you’re saying without looking at you.
3) The dog actually uses her sense and moves whenever you walk in her path!
(That’s cool to witness)
2) I love watching you shoot hoops with your kleenex.
And the number one thing I like about you being blind?
Watching you mow the lawn! Eat with your fingers! And do amazing stunts!That's three but hey, I'm allowed.
But...You know we can’t wait until the day you can see my beautiful face again!hahahaha
I’m with ya, babe!