Men's Fraternity Week 18

Men’s Fraternity
Week #18 Control

I. Deep Idol of Control

1. Idol of Control is when I am unwilling to let go of my agenda and let God do His work.
2. When we are feeling powerless or circumstances are overwhelming the enemy proposes the lie that, “we must do something (be in control) or we will be hurt.”
   
   • When I am feeling powerless I no longer turn to God, instead my new idol of control is what I live by to protect myself from feeling powerless.

II. Manifestations of the Control Idol

1. Manifests itself in fear and anxiety.
   
   • Fear and anxiety surface when you might lose influence over something you want, and uncertainty about someone or something.
   
   Matthew 16:22-23
   Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him saying, ‘Far be it from you Lord! This shall never happen to you.’ Jesus said to Peter, ‘Get behind me Satan! You are a hindrance to me. For you are not setting your mind on things of God, but on the things of man.’
   
   Luke 12:25-26
   Which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do a small thing as that why are you anxious about the rest.
   
   
   • Fear shows itself in many ways:
   • I am irritated
   • I am unsatisfied
   • I am restless
   • I am unhappy
   
   
2. Manifests itself in workaholism.
   
   • Having “work” under control gives the illusion and mirage of security.
   
   Matthew 16:26
   What will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul?
   
   
3. Manifests itself in anger.
   
   • When I cannot control a situation and begin to feel as if I am losing control the result is anger.
   • Look behind anger and you will find fear. Look behind fear and you will find control.
   
   Ecclesiastes 7:9
   Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the heart of fools.
   
   Proverbs 14:29
   Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.
   
   [Important to remember: Sometimes God removes our control to protect us.]

III. Replace Idol of Control Through Relinquishment

1. Greatest stumbling block in growing in our relationship with God is that we no longer can be in control.
2. Definition of Relinquishment: to surrender a possession or right.
3. Jesus is the great example of relinquishing His right to the Father.
   
   John 5:30
   I can do nothing on my own. As I hear, I judge and my judgment is just, because I seek not my own will but the will of him who sent me.
   
   Luke 22:42
   Father if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless not my will, but yours be done.
   
   If Jesus our Savior exchanged His will for God’s will, then why would we entertain ideas that our self-will is something we are master over?
   
   
4. Relinquishing is a trust issue.


Do we trust God enough to let go of our heart and life - of our self-will and let God have his way in our life?


• Letting go is rarely easy or desirable. It is like a wrestling match – a match of the will, God’s will VS my will.
• If relinquishing is a trust issue, then when an issue of relinquishing arises, the true colors of our heart’s devotion to Him will emerge.


5. Being a follower of Christ is not willing to relinquish my sin only, but my whole way of looking at things.
   
   Galatians 2:20
   I have been crucified with Christ, it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me, and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
   
   
   • ”…it is no longer I who live…” – means, my life is no longer identified as mine – I give up my rights.
   • When we relinquish our will to God, we settle with the truth of His sovereignty and live in peace allowing the outcome of our circumstances to be in the hands of our loving Father.

Discussion:

1. Several manifestations emerge from the deep idol of control: fear, workaholism, and anger. Discuss any of these manifestations that can be a temptation for you.

2. How should the concept of relinquishing (surrender of rights) change our approach towards our Control Idol in our lives?

3. Read Jeremiah 17:5-8. Discuss how this passage relates to what we have seen today.